[Lifestyle] Love Is A Useless Word. Here Are 3 Alternatives That Make More Sense

When you’re feeling in love, there’s a hidden societal desire that you two need to spend each waking minute together and that a dynamic sexual life comes simple. You need to be with your lover constantly, and you need them every time.

That is a pleasant idea, yet it’s an extremely difficult request and scarcely supportable in the long term, Philosopher Alain de Botton says in another video from The School of Life YouTube channel.

 

In the showed video clip, the British writer prescribes we put aside our glorified ideas about adoration and look rather to the old Greeks, who had confidence in three principle sorts of love:

  • There’s “eros,” the kind of white-hot passion you feel early on in the relationship.
  • Then there’s “philia,” the deep, abiding friendship you hopefully develop with your partner over time.
  • And lastly, there’s “agape,” the charitable love you feel toward your S.O. when they make a mistake, for instance.

As de Botton explains it, “philia” is particularly important in a long-term relationship, because the hot-and-heavy “eros” phases tend to come and go.

“Our feelings of ‘eros’ can evolve into another sort of love: ‘philia.’ It’s normally translated into ‘friendship,’ though the Greek words is far warmer, more loyal and touching than its English counterpart,” he explains. “One might be willing to die for ‘philia.’”

Watch the clip above for more on the three types of love.

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